Fear or Freedom?

Self confidence is something only you can give to yourself. It all starts with your beliefs and your self talk. There are two kinds of thinkers – fear or freedom.

Fear based thinkers

“I am not good enough.” “I will never win.” “I will be happy when ____ .” My favorite one is “I will be happy when my boss leaves.” They focus on the struggle or feeling that they have to overcome something and almost focus less on the accomplishment of their goal. We love to achieve goals but did your struggle to get there exhaust you and leave you totally fried? Fear and struggle is overrated.

Freedom based thinkers

“I’m not sure where this next job is going to lead but I know it is the right step on my journey.” “I had a hard day but it is only one day and I have lots of blessings.” Maybe you know someone who always seems optimistic, cheerful and doesn’t let stuff bother them. They love who they are and focus on being their best and know that every day is a new day to start fresh. They make life look easy and it seems they have luck on their side.

How do you get from fear to freedom? You make the decision that you already have an abundance of everything you need. You feel you are whole, resourceful and creative. You view life as a journey not a destination. You may say, but Chere I don’t have everything I need. I will say, “But what you have right now is all you got so you better get busy.” Focus on who you want to become NOT overcome. You have to be enough before you are MORE.

Think of something you wanted like a job or new car or possession. Maybe you believed you couldn’t have it or it would be a struggle to get it. “It will be hard to do or hard to get.” Your beliefs became your reality. When your self talk is fear based of course you will not get it.

When you change your beliefs based on freedom and make the decision you have everything you need to get what you want, you will receive it. As Napolean Hill states, “Conceive the idea. Believe you can do it. Achieve. “ Simple as that!

How one client made her dreams come true

Magic M has been a coaching client for 4 years. We discovered that one of her personal needs was to nurture. She decided she could not get her nurture need met as a research engineer. Through the MAPP assessment, Signature Strengths assessment and looking at her gifts she discovered what she wanted and got more than she ever expected!

Magic M writes:

“I want to shout to the world: if you expect more, the more you will get. I am truly grateful for my career as a senior research engineer. It gave me amazing experiences that only Magic M (that’s me!) can share with students. My career also let me know that I would never truly have my needs met (once I figured out what my needs were!) — the needs to nurture, achieve, and set standards.

The pivotal moment for me was when I had the opportunity to stand up in front of a classroom and tell junior high girls about the career of engineering. I LOVED being in front of them. It felt like I could almost feel the nurture in me reaching out and floating in the room. It seemed very natural for me to be up in front of the girls. I loved seeing the looks on their faces! It was several years later before I took the big step, but without that moment, I think I would have always been scared to take the step.

Over the past year, I have really tried to live a life full of attraction; Chere and I have been working on this for a while! I have been trying to attract things I want to happen to me, and with that mindset, things DID start coming to me. I didn’t know how I could be a teacher, but the how didn’t matter.

I just knew that my dream was to be a teacher!

Chere taught me how to let go of the “stinkin’ thinking” and just go for it! The “hows” started to fall into place. I found out about Teach TN (with only 48 hours left to apply and with a huge portfolio requirement and FIVE reference letters required), and I was accepted. I was told that I would never get the school system I wanted, and not only did I get in but got the exact job I wanted. I was scared to death that my bosses would hate me for leaving them, and they could not be more supportive of my decision (my director even told me how commendable it was to go for a dream!). I was terrified that my work required for Teach TN would not be acceptable, and the director said it was better than anything else she had seen. She told me I was ready to be a teacher! Wow!!! The “hows” worked out better than I could imagine.

I often say that my life is better than my dreams, and it really is true. There is no way I could have done this without expecting more and attracting more!!!! It was almost like an overnight experience; when I started expecting good things to happen to me, they did!

My thoughts were no longer full of the “shoulds” or “what ifs.” Chere showed me the path, and she helped me realize that all of this could happen!!! I am taking a big, fat, scary step in my life, but I know that I will never have to say that I regret not trying. It is really worth it to step out and take a chance!

I am the luckiest girl in the world!”
—Magic M

If you think you are lucky, you are! Allow your luck to make it the best year of your life. What are you waiting for?

With much gratitude, 

3 thoughts on “Fear or Freedom?”

  1. “I often say my life is better than my dreams” (: What a wonderful statement to make and inspiration to all of us who read this and of course everyone we will tell – I will start with this statement “you know what someone said and did …..” Great job Cher and Magic!

    1. Beth you always find the pot of gold in every day don’t you.
      You are filled with gratitude in every email you write. I am happy you share your thoughts with us.

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